I’ve sure been hitting my inner-critic a lot lately. Or perhaps it’s just that now I’m aware (more than ever before) and I’m listening. She says that this painting isn’t good enough. She says that I still need to work on textures (non-equine) and people a lot more before I tackle a project like this. She says that I need this and that and that before I’ll ever be good enough.
She sure talks a lot.
And she talks about a lot more stuff than just my painting…
~
I know I’ve been quiet for a while now. I haven’t felt like sharing too much of what has been going on in my head. Feels like a bit of a power drain when I do that….so I’ve been letting things simmer without too much outward explanation. Don’t worry….if I have any profound realizations I’ll share. :)
Also, we’ve just been really busy. I’ve been transitioning to working from home and we have a possible move coming up. Even if that move doesn’t happen it’s likely that we’ll be moving somewhere within the next few months unless our mortgage company gets really helpful or my husband is able to find a good paying job within a hour’s commute. I’m not much for leaving things up to fate but then I realize that a lot of these things are out of my control (and you know how I hate that) and that what will be, will be. We just have to keep ourselves available for opportunity when it arises. We’ve still got food on our table and a roof over our heads and hey, I’ve been painting a little bit again!
I’ve also been spending a lot more time with my little girl. We work on art projects nearly every day and she’s got a Kindergarten prep book we’re working our way through as well. Hard to believe she’ll be starting school this fall…
Oh, and I have another new nephew! I’ll get to meet him and my other little nephew in July when we go back home for a visit.
Yep, things are keeping me busy but I’m trying to get back to my art…and trying to not let myself get discouraged that I keep having to knock the rust off everytime I sit down to paint.
5 comments
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June 9, 2009 at 8:15 pm
Greenwoman2007
Hey there chickie…What a lovely painting. I likey.
Quiet sometimes keeps the power inside where it needs to be.
Congrats on the new nephew and the additional time with your little one.
I’m very glad that life is remaining abundant with the basics at the moment. It sounds like there’s great change in store for the two of you. An adventure to be sure. The unknown is disconcerting. But it can be freeing too. Hang in there. ((hugs))
June 11, 2009 at 3:37 am
Anjolie
GW: Thank you, it’s a preliminary run on an idea. I’ve got an image in my head that I still haven’t been able to get out…but this is one angle of it.
Quiet…yep, been needing to keep quiet.
Life has presenting us with a great opportunity to realize what really matters and we’re focusing on those things and making the best choices we can to make the life that we really want to have, happen. Feels a bit like working backwards at the current moment but I think that’s just the way it works sometimes.
June 13, 2009 at 6:03 pm
Cord
I like to use the word “acceptance” in place of forgiveness since acceptance seems to imply a stronger sense of being “ok” with a less than satisfactory situation. At least for me the word forgiveness seems to imply more of a complete erasure whereas acceptance seems to imply a more unsettled understanding.
A fine line on the bridge:)
June 15, 2009 at 3:20 am
Anjolie
Cord: I’m fairly certain that you meant this comment for the following post. Not sure why it ended up here.
I don’t know that I concur with your fine line. I do believe that there are often things that we come to accept…but I also believe that in our hearts we have the capacity for forgiveness for a reason. We can forgive and accept at the same time or we can forgive and not accept and then of course, we can accept and yet not forgive. In my heart of hearts I would prefer either of the former to the latter.
But then, I also accept that I am not always able to forgive… ;)
June 23, 2009 at 1:40 pm
gypsy-heart
It’s good to see you are creating again…I really like this piece!
Sage words from you and your commentators. I like the energy I feel around you now!
Peace of heart to you!
Ps Keep us informed about relocating.
Thank you, Susan. This was just a preliminary sketch…but I’m working on the concept. Trying to keep the energy up, this pending move-to-who-knows-where-just-yet is driving me bonkers but I’ll be sure to let everyone know just as soon as I have a definite answer.